Domina's D/s Humor Page

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The Cat In The Hood  
Author: Leviticus 1999
      Whenever possible, permission to use a joke is gained from the

(With apologies to Dr. Seuss)
       Our Master was gone.
       Us forbidden to play.
       So we knelt on our knees
       On that cold, cold wet day.
I knelt there with Sally.
       We knelt there, we two.
       And oh how I wished
       there was something to do.
       Too chained to move much
      And too gagged to make noise.
       So we knelt in the house,
       Our Master's good toys.
       All we could do was to
       And hope that our Master
       would not be too late.
       And then
       Something went BUMP!
       How that bump made us jump!
       We looked!
       And we saw him
       The Cat in the Hood!
       And he stared at us keenly
       Like most Masters would.
       And he said to us,
       "Why do you kneel there like that?"
       "I know you are gagged
       And chained by the tummy.
       But we could have
       Lots of good fun that is funny!"
       "I know some good games we could play,"
       Said the Cat.
       "I know some new tricks,"
       Said the black hooded Cat.
       "A lot of good tricks.
       I will show them to you.
       Your Master
       Will not mind at all if I do."
       Sally and I
       Were not able to say.
       That our Master was out of the house
       For the day.
       But our fish said, "No! No!
       Cat you must go away!
       For Sally and Amy
       Aren't permitted to play!
       You should not be here.
       You should not be about.
       You should not be here
       When their Master is out!"
       "Now! Now! have no fear."
       Said the Cat in the Hood.
       "My tricks are not bad,
       in fact they're quite good!
       But first we should get them
       Up from their knees!"
       And he pulled from the air
       A large ring full of keys.
       "Have no fear." said the Cat.
       "I will not let you fall.
       As I string you up high
       While you stand on a ball.
       With one leg tied high,
       Exposing your twat.
       But that is not all I can do!"
       Said the Cat...
       In a moment poor Sally
       Was strung up as he said.
       And the Cat he approached me
       A tilt to his head.
       "Look at me!
       Look at me now!" said the Cat.
       And he gave my bound head
       A delicate pat.
       "With a rope web or two
       And a clit chain perhaps.
       You might look nice
       On your knees doing laps.
       Or perhaps in that chair,
       Yes that's what I'll do.
       I'll tie you up tight
       and your little friend too!"
       In a flash I was bound
       In a tight web of rope.
       Of freeing myself
       I held out no hope.
       The Cat in the Hood
       Pulled the knots tight with glee,
       And couldn't resist playing
       With Sally and me.
       He tortured us madly
       By licking our clits.
       That rough old cat tongue
       He used on our slits!
       Soon we began cumming
       And cumming some more!
       Our cum juice was dripping
       All over the floor!
       Our fish he kept saying
       >From his watery spot.
       He said, "Do I like this?
       Oh no! I do not.
       This is not a good game,
       They are not meant to play!
       For them to both cum
       Was not sanctioned today!"
       "Now look what you did!"
       Said the fish to the cat.
       "Now look at the floor!
       Look at Sally's wide twat!
       Her cum it did fall
       On the floor like the rain.
       I'm afraid that clean floor,
       Will not be the same.
       And Amy she cries,
       For she can't get away
       From your tongue, she knows
       She was told not to play!
       You SHOULD NOT be here
       When their Master is not.
       You get out of this house!"
       Said the fish from his spot.
       "But I have to be here.
       For that is my role!"
       Said the Cat in the Hood
       To the fish in the bowl.
       "I will not go away.
       I do NOT wish to go!
       And so," said the Cat in the Hood,
       "So so so... I will show you
       Another good game that I know!"
       And then he ran out.
       And, then, fast as a fox,
       The Cat in the Hood
       Came back in with a box.
       A big red wood box.
       I was shut with a lock.
       "Now look at this trick!"
       And he gave it a knock.
       Then he got up on top
       Gave the padlock a tap.
       "I call this game FUN-IN-A-BOX,"
       Said the cat.
       "In this box are two slaves
       I will show to you now.
       You will like these two slaves,"
       Said the cat with a bow.
       As he undid the lock
       He said "They are brand new.
       Two slaves. And I call them
       Slave One and Slave Two.
       These slaves will not bite you.
       They want to have fun."
       Then from out of the box
       Fell Slave Two and Slave One.
       They go to their knees
       And said "How do you do?
       Would you like to have sex
       with Slave One and Slave Two?"
       And Sally and I
       Did not know what to do.
       Our bonds were too tight,
       We could not wriggle through.
       We could not refuse,
       But our fish said, "No! No!
       Those slaves should not be
       In this house! Make them go!
       They should NOT be about
       While the Master's not here.
       Put the out! Put them out!
       Make them both disappear!"
       "Have no fear little fish,"
       Said the Cat in the Hood.
       "These slaves are good slaves,
       They behave as they should.
       They are trained oh so trained!
       They have come here to play.
       They have come for your cum
       On this wet, wet, wet day."
       "Now the game that they like,"
       Said the Cat, "is to tease."
       And with that, both male slaves
       Jumped up from their knees.
       To Sally and I
       They approached with great glee.
       With hard ons a bobbing
       As we could both see.
       Slave One approached Sally
       and slipped in with ease.
       He pumped her quite slowly,
       In order to tease.
       Slave two was more wicked,
       He tipped my chair back.
       He found Master's flogger
       And gave me a whack.
       My breasts were soon red,
       And he switched to my cunny.
       The Cat in the Hood,
       found it all very funny.
       He laughed and he cried
       As we both went through hell.
       Our urge to cum building
       And making us yell.
       Soon Sally and I,
       We could stand it no more.
       And cum juice went spurting
       All over the floor.
       Slave One and Slave Two.
       They dropped to the floor.
       They lapped up our cum
       And attacked us for more.
       Then our fish said "Look! Look!"
       And our fish shook with fear.
       "Your Master is on his way home!
       Do you hear?
       Oh what will he do to us?
       What will he say?
       Oh he will not like it
       To find you this way!"
       But try as we might
       We could not get away,
       And Slave One and Slave Two
       Began once more to play.

       They traded their places,
       Now I was being pumped.
       While Sally, poor Sally,
       Was being soundly thumped.
       The Cat in the Hood
       He lay back on the floor,
       And waited for Master
       To open the door.
       Our Master appeared
       We felt rescue was here.
       But instead he ignored us,
       That made us feel fear.
       To the Cat in the Hood he said,
       "At last you came!
       I was tired of those little slaves
       And their games.
       They are yours if you want,
       I give them to you.
       If you like, you can even
       Take my goldfish too!"
       The Cat in the Hood
       Jumped up with a roll,
       And ran to the fish
       All alone in his bowl.
       "No! No!" said the fish,
       "To do this is wrong!"
       But the cat ate him up
       And soon he was gone.
       "Slave One and Slave Two!"
       Said the Cat in the Hood.
       "Let's pack up our playthings
       As all good guests should!
       I always pick up all
       My playthings and so...
       I will show you another
       Good trick that I know!"
       Our ropes were untied,
       Though our gags stayed in place.
       They folded us up
       And proceeded post haste
       To the big red wood box
       With the lock on the side,
       And Sally and I
       Through our gags we both cried.
       We were placed in the box
       And the slaves jumped on top,
       They spread our legs wide
       and slid in with a plop.
       The Cat in the Hood
       Closed the box with a crash
       And said to our Master.
       "And now I must dash!
       New playthings to train,
       And soon I'll have more!
       I think I'll call these ones
       Slave Three and Slave Four!"
       I was jerked quite awake
       By the sound of the door.
       I had fallen asleep
       At my place on the floor.
       No sign of a box
       Or a Cat in a Hood.
       Just my Master, home at last
       Like we both hoped he would.
       "So little slaves,"
       He said to us two,
       "Did you have any fun?
       Tell me. What did you do?"
       We knew he was joking
       For he knew we could not
       Have done much since we were both
       Chained to this spot.
       He freed us at last
       And took us in his arms.
       And his strength reassured me
       I would come to no harm.
       But what of my dream,
       Of the Cat in the Hood?
       Of the talking fish
       And the box made of wood?
       Should I tell him about it?
       Well, what should I do?
       Would you tell all you dreamed,
       If your Master asked YOU?

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